5:43 p.m. - 2008-01-24
Spoonboy and Forkman to the rescue!
Found myself at crossroads last night.
Got upset. Talked about it. Got over it. Point of view.
Took a whole instead of a half because it was hard to breathe.
Tired. really tired. Made paying attention difficult.
Weird dazes and the images of half sleep were about emma and CS and not being able to go in and my mom driving her down here.
This year they're going to Florida and New Orleans for ASB and it's only 50 bucks. I would like to go. I would also like to go and see my family. SO I won't go this year. Next year they're going to Jamaica.
Meetings tonight. Phi Sigma Eta maybe? and something else. I don't know.
dazed. Happy.
Snowed all day. I wore snow boots and my winter coat and I felt like a teddy bear.
Jawbreaker is singing to me. But I have an intense need for rilo kiley. i cannot even explain it.
I can do the frug.
I need glendora. And i also have an intense need to be somewhere warm, on a beach, with warm water, while it snows. I need this place. Or maybe i don't.
It's PBJ day because our bread is going to expire soon.
Jessie and I have joint custody, but i forgot it this weekend. It felt neglected, so I talked to it from the hall, through the door.
Don't grow mold or mildew.
Don't grow up.
Stay this way forever.
They keep talking about the next 3 years, 4 years, or 5 years.
We'll do this or this or this. I'm not sure, I say.
I want to take things as they go. i want to visit everything and experience everything and always be somewhere at some point.
And sometimes when you're on, you're really fucking on!
I really want me rilo kiley mix. I don't know where it is. And sleep.
I suddenly never have much homework ...aside from reading and that's not a big deal.
I should call, maybe, but maybe not. Am I still a good friend?
I doubt it.
Am I still a good person?
Well, I seriously doubt that.
Do I still care?
Always.
Can I save the world?
Probably not, but I'll like to try.
Things to do at some point:
buy an invisible children shirt
go to ireland
do extensive research on transplants and aids
go to third world countries to attempt to make a difference in aids research there
figure out why heart disease is the number one killer in america
see the grand canyon.....by driving there
go back to california
live in boston
try one of the most ridiculous sounding coffees
become an excellent role model concerning patience and unconditional love
make a list each day of five things that made me happy
expect nothing and be grateful for everything
take picture of people with the people in their lives that they love...and then give them the pictures.
always play padiddle
always go to free shows in government center
continue to like really bad, but dancey music.
look into teachforamerica.com
consider the possibilities
learn to stop holding people to such high standards
always hold myself to a higher standard- get better at something every day
read always, because it's dumb, in the most basic definition of the word, to not. there are so many books, why not read them all?
dance, always.
wear sunglasses. jump in puddles. catch snowflakes. wear mittens.
"turn the volume up to 50"
l "travel to many accidental places"
write. remember. move on when necessary. take too many pictures. meet everyone. act ridiculous. love life.
Five things that I loved about today:
1.) Didn't know it was snowing until I went outside today- wonderful surprise. Big flakes.
2.) Napping.
3.) Hot water in the shower.
4.) Europe pictures at work with Brandi (plus cookies from Mark's wife!)
5.) Peanut butter sandwich and watching the snowflakes with Jessie.
6.) Confirmation of what is yet to come. =)
