11:49 p.m. - 2007-12-11
our love is like the border between greece and albania
The Beatles really had something. SImplicity. Happiness. Each other. The girl behind me in my last music class ever speaks of her hair. Compares it to the Beatles without product. She is not Beatles. She is loud, obnoxious even and her voice lacks all harmony. Im not one either.
I'm no Sadie or Martha and I'm not even close to a Lucy or a Julia. And starbucks may just be too rich for me. Might as well buy alcohol. It's cheaper and gets the job done quicker.
Who needs free will? Who needs people? Who needs life and its study? Who needs it?
I'll slowly raise my hand and take a breath. I'm nervous. It's so hard to speak now. So hard.
It's 60 degrees and cloudy everywhere. It's just wet and muggy and gloomy. And I kinda feel like my mood matches the weather. too uncomfortable for comfort- unable to breathe in a sweatshirt and pushing my way through the aisle of smoke that lines the dorm doors. This weather makes everyone want to smoke- just to get something out there- to be a part of it- to do something on days like today.
instead, i drink starbucks. and write. and put my head on the desk, biting my lip, knowing that i hate everyone today for whatever reason. and i just want to stereotype. you are all intolerant, frustrating, patience trying, liars.
But, on the other hand, it is days like today that really make me want to be extra honest. it's not even brutal. I try to be nice about it.
I had so much more to say and so many other ways of saying it, but it's not here. I am stuck. I am caught somewhere else tonight.
In short: I know nothing and i will never figure it out.
"people say friends don't destroy one another. what do they know about friends?
