11:49 p.m. - 2005-07-20
I'm going to lock this feeling up and wear it on a chain. I want summer in my locket.
Do you remember when we used to be able to talk and understand and be happy and have fun...all at once? I always said you'd leave first. But there was a tiem when we never even had to say a word and I missed that for a while.
Summers used to feel warmer and relaxed. I'm thinking pre-air conditioner though, when all we wanted to do was spend every minute in the pool and at midnight I'd sneak out and make whirl pools- alone or otherwise. I never cared about being alone, then. I don't know why I do now. "When I was growing up, time never seemed to matter. No one was in a
hurry and the sun seemed to go down on my command and in response to
how sleepy I was feeling. Summers were long and warm, but never too
hot and at night I'd catch fireflies, name them, and then set them
free. I'd wake up early to savor every moment allowed outside and you
could tell the weather by whether or not I was swimming in the pool.
Nothing outside of my reach was important. I remember always feeling
more or less content with everything."
Yes. That was true. But, we move on. We don't know each other anymore and I don't really swim at night anymore because there is no reason or need for either.
I don't know. I'm tired in a really nice summery way, but the way we're I've been constantly going. Summers are fast now and they're gone before I adapt to the time change, but it's okay because time is always slipping through our fingertips and I'd rather enjoy every minute available to me, then waste it on something tha's simply not worth it. I'd rather be on the outside looking in, then screaming from the inside.
And yeah, maybe we'll never talk again, but it was sure nice talking to you right now.
